April 08, 2005

The Futility of Cream Pies

Okay, dadaism is cute, sure, but the bartender is right when he says it's totally counterproductive and juvenile. And no, this is me saying this, not some pathetic Kevin Mattson clone. See, creative metaphors, or even simple ones, are not going to make dipshits like David Horowitz go away- it'll make them angrier or, more likely, stoke their supposed victimhood- even legitimize it. Fuck that. Dressing up in stupid costumes with Bush masks or whatever like people did at the RNC convention isn't going to work- it's sure done a helluva lot of good so far, no? Oh, nevermind, because the Republicans still control everything.

Oho, so why don't you just lighten the hell up, my lefty friends would say. Well, I'm a lefty too and a fat fucking lot of good that would really do us. And no (again), I'm definitely not irrationally angry all the time about any of this. Why would I be? I'm white, straight, male, employed, and doing fine, thanks. Problem is, every pie we throw makes a martyr, like the bartender says. It lets all these dumb bastards whine even louder about how the liberals are out to get them. They'll feel all righteously angry and get all their troglodytic Jesusland-suckers riled up too, and then you can kiss your liberal ass goodbye, dude. The Dadaists didn't last too long in '30s Germany- their brand of clever, biting humor really couldn't do much against crazed, murderous thugs with guns. Woody Allen said something like that.

Ah, screw it. Some fool will come along and say I'm part of the circular firing squad. Since I can't write for beans anymore, of course.

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