December 06, 2009

O.C. School District to Its Teachers: Go F**k Yourselves



Those damnable, pesky public employee unions! If it weren't for them and their cushy, decadent benefits packages, California's sterling government would surely be nowhere near the level of crushing idiocy that currently pervades the hallowed halls of Sacramento. And now, now those ungrateful teachers and their annoying elitist union have the temerity to continue to take no shit from a district beset by its own rampant corrupt stupidity, and have chosen to express their collective feelings via three hundred middle fingers:

Teachers angry at the Capistrano Unified School District's proposal to cut their pay by 10% held a rally Saturday to protest the move. The demonstration, which took place near the Mission Viejo Mall, drew more than 300 people, according to organizers of the event. It marked the latest in a series of actions highlighting teachers' dissatisfaction with contract negotiations and the school board.
Profaning the sanctity of a refurbished mall, fer crissakes! What in blazes is the world coming to? I mean, don't those whiny punks realize that the district needs to slash $25 million from its 2010/11 budget, to offset such essential expenses as palatial office complexes and ongoing legal fees from an Iran-Iraq war of a recall election?

Not to mention the known costs associated with an irritating parent-teacher initiative that would clobber the budget to the tune of another $500K. The nerve! Where will it end? Isn't it enough to be mocked in both print and pixel, and slandered to disturbing degrees by long-disgruntled students brimming over with impotent revenge?
Oh yes, regime change had finally come back to Capistrano—just like those pestilential swallows—in the form of an overblown auto de fe by ex-Superintendent James Fleming and his faithful right hand, Associate Superintendent Susan McGill. Theirs was a sordid story of supposed sin that I'd managed to remain completely ignorant of, despite repeated hints dropped by various well-meaning friends and relatives who have worked or currently work for CUSD. It had everything, though—arrogance, intimidation, entitlement, corruption, decadence—including a certain secret ingredient that made it irresistible to me.
What the hell, indeed. Don't these fools know that you go to class with the pennies you have, and not the millions you wish you had? Tell 'em, Anna:
"These are difficult times for all institutions, not just school districts," said trustee Anna Bryson. "We have to work with the money that we have, and that keeps getting smaller."
Like, totally, baby. Don't take any guff from these overeducated babies. Stomp the buggers. Hire scabs if you have to—hell, you could rescind some of those 6-months-delayed rejection letters we sent out to all those qualified bright young people who grovel at our feet whenever UCI or whatever other school graduates a new class of fresh-faced, credentialed teachers. Yeah, hire those kids at a fraction of the contracted salary. They'll take it, won't they?

And for God's sake, show no mercy on those 300 uppities in Mission Viejo. This is the twenty-first century, hon—unions are dead, and no one gives a shit about their selfish, coddled members anyway. It's high time that they were cut down to size, just like back in the good old days. What are those Pinkerton gentlemen up to, anyway? Give them a call. We simply cannot have this level of disturbance in a district of this size.

It's not about us covering our own asses for decades of congenital stupidity. It's really all about the kids. The teachers have never ever considered their pupils in all this, have they? of course not. It's all about them:
Vicki Soderberg, president of the Capistrano Unified Education Assn., which represents some 2,200 teachers, said the proposed salary decrease would be dire. "Asking for a 10% pay cut would throw a lot of our teachers out of their homes and onto the streets," she said.
Vicki, you cold-hearted snake. Won't someone please think of the children?

Cross-posted: dkos, cal

7 comments:

  1. CUSD is almost totally fucked: an obsolete estimation of resources leaves them underfunded by the state (not the district's fault as far as I know), bafflingly incompetent leadership decisions (the Taj Mahal district office, the pointless and wasteful recall, the new high school built in a firezone right next to a fucking dump) and pathetically slow bureaucratic processes keep it, from an administrative standpoint, in what Strong Bad would describe as a "sty hole."

    ...And yet I'd still go work there if I could.

    Shit.

    This is a rant I should cobble together for my blog, but how the fuck we're going to teach the members of our society how our society works when crap like this is going down I have no clue.

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  2. At this point I'm thinking that it needs a Great Schism of some kind. North-South, maybe? El Toro/Trabuco/Mission Viejo vs Capo/Dana/San Clemente. To the death. No—to the pain. Middle schools and elementaries straggling behind, with the TaJ Mahal standing in for Antietam, or Pelennor, or Dresden, or...

    Oh wait, there are several "border states" now, right? Aliso, SJ Hills, and...is there another one? Well, no one wants to be stuck with the school by the dump, do they?

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  3. Tesoro, that's the other one. And I forgot that ET, TH, and MV are Saddleback. So that pits oldies on newbies: DHHS/CVHS/SCHS vs THS, SJHS, ANHS.

    Heh. "Anus."

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  4. Best. School. Acronym. Ever.

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  5. On a completely unrelated note, the word I just had to type in to prove I was human (interesting Turing Test, eh?) was "frackf."

    "What the frackf were you doing out there, Starbuck?!"

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  6. Turing would have loved the idea of Cylons. And yeah, that was a main fail point for me, what happened to Starbuck in that show.

    Her response to your question would probably be something like "frak you, motherfrakker. Come the frak over here and say that."

    Like the Smurfs would use the word "smurf."

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  7. For the record, when I entered my last comment the verification word was "coleg." I interpreted that as how our underfunded school system attendees will eventually spell "college," a place that they will be less likely to attend.

    Maybe the comment system is actually intelligent and is trying to speak to me through kind of relevant words.

    Also, the word for Smurf in Spanish is "pitufo." How awesome is that? (I know this because Karla calls me that sometimes.)

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